I don’t know why I bother answering my door anymore
Allow me to set the scene.
It’s 3:30 pm on a Sunday. I am fresh from the shower, putting on my clean “daytime pyjamas”, and the doorbell rings. I usually don’t even bother answering my doorbell; it’s always either Greenpeace, Mormons, or Nader. Nader is my only friend who comes over without phoning first, and I’m pretty much used to it by now (Pete: “Heaven forbid Nader ever becomes a Mormon and joins Greenpeace”). But he lives in Montreal nowadays.
The doorbell rings again. Maybe Nader decided to make a secret visit home? Guh, better go check. I toss on a sweater and rush downstairs. Sadly, I do not find a swarthy Lebanese man on my doorstep. It’s a guy in very self-consciously business-appropriate attire.
“Hi, I’m Michael. I work for Edward Jones investments. We’re opening an office nearby and we’re going around the area getting to know our neighbours. What’s your name?”
From there, the questions start coming at me faster than I can say, “Not interested.” How long have you lived in the area? Where did you live before? Do you like living here? What do you like about the area? Where do you work? Oh, a student? Where do you go? What do you take in school?
And then, poor soul, he asks the one question I detest most in the universe: “If you don’t mind me asking, what do you plan on doing with a degree in art history?” Game over, Michael. Game over.
“Ummm, I’m sorry but…why are you asking me all these questions?”
“We’re just trying to get to know our neighbours.”
“Because I find it really invasive and it’s making me uncomfortable.”
“I completely understand, I don’t want to make you uncomfortable. This is just something we do, we go out in the community and talk to people.”
“That’s fine, I just don’t think I’m your target demographic.”
“Really, why is that?”
“Well, I could see how some people—you know, older people—might like the convenience of getting home visits from financial advisors. But I consider my home my personal sanctuary, and I find your coming here and asking me all these questions a major invasion of my privacy. If I’m getting financial planning advice, I want to be doing it outside of my home at an office during regular business hours. Not on a Sunday afternoon.”
The guy barely flinched; what a salesman! “I take it that you probably don’t want to give me your contact information so I can follow up with you once we have our office established.”
“Right. Have a good afternoon.” Door shuts.
So of course I head back upstairs and immediately google “Edward Jones”. The company is totally legit, but sounds seriously sketchy for everyone involved. Basically, Edward Jones is a large brokerage firm that hires people with no financial background and puts them through a two month program where they get sales training and their brokering license. I read about the training program on the Edward Jones website, and it sounds like Michael was in his “Prospecting Week”:
You will spend this week in the market you have selected to build your Edward Jones business. You will complete a minimum of 125* face-to-face first and repeat contacts (25 per day) consisting of business owners and individuals, ask potential clients “open-ended” questions to obtain financial information, assess each contact and indicate the next action. To qualify for Evaluation/Graduation, you must schedule 125* prospect follow-up calls to take place during the week of Evaluation/Graduation.
Wow, I really enjoyed those open-ended questions asked to assess me and obtain financial information. What a nice personal touch!
Those who pass the training become “Financial Advisors” and sell Edward Jones services through small offices in small communities. Advisors seek clients through door-to-door cold calling and employ aggressive sales tactics. This can lead to business practices that are morally questionable, like targeting lonely senior citizens and their retirement savings. I’m not saying this always happens, but the pay is 100% commission-based and from what I’ve seen on employment review sites it doesn’t sound like you make very much money as a financial advisor unless you are a sales superstar.
Anyway, that was the last straw. I’m buying one of those “no solicitors” signs for my front door. Nader, consider yourself warned!
October 26, 2009 2:29 am
Liam said:
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Yeah, I’ve really grown to hate answering the door as well. Partially, even if there’s a charity or something that I feel I would at some point contribute to, I tend to prefer going about it in my own way, and the cold-calling sours me on the whole thing.
My personal ‘fave’ are realtors who are fishing for business, and if I haven’t shut the door in their face right away, I enjoy stringing them along for as long as possible before dropping my triple bomb on them: we don’t own, we’re renting from a co-op (not even paying to reinforce market rates!), and we’re both unemployed. The game I enjoy playing is seeing just how fast they try to get away after hearing those doozies, even if I’m still trying to engage them in questions.
Runner up for worst has gotta be sharkish salespeople who, after getting a pretty brusque brush-off from one tenant of the house (me), then immediately still ring the other doorbell of the house, assuming our downstairs neighbour, who’s been listening the whole time and wants possibly less to do with them, will be more accommodating.